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This newsletter is entitled...

Surrender (Letting Go)


There are many paths to the river but the final step is always SURRENDER. There is no painless path to soul consciousness - the path is not through the mind. The true path is SURRENDERING TO THE HEART.

So what do I mean by SURRENDER?

It means letting go of the ego's need to protect and control.
It means being totally in the moment - not the past or future.
It means being out of your head and in your feelings and heart.
It means being seemingly out of control.
It means being open to inner guidance versus outer guidance.
It means being vulnerable and real. It means letting go of fear.

LOVE IS THE THRESHOLD TO ANOTHER UNIVERSE - Teilhard de Chardin

Surrendering to love is much like our original birth passage - for we are surrendering to a force far greater than ourselves or our ego and its need to control. As such, Love represents another passage - the passage from ego consciousness to soul consciousness. Obviously, the experience of love is a threat to the ego for it represents realness and heart-felt feelings - which the ego was created to avoid at all costs.

THINK NOT THAT YOU CAN DIRECT THE COURSE OF LOVE , FOR LOVE, IF IT FINDS YOU WORTHY, DIRECTS YOUR COURSE - Gibran

Love is not about control - Love is all about surrender! In that regard, there are three types of relationships:

  1. "Going through the motions" relationships. Partners are joined by common fears and completely dependent on each other. There is little, if any passion, few risks are taken and no real growth occurs, It is a dry creek bed waiting for the spring rain. COLOR IT GREY
  2. "Safe Love" relationships. The ego is still in control and both partners have common dis-affinities such as unworthiness, fear of love and intimacy. These tend to be intense and short lived relationships as both partners vainly try to fill the others emotional void - when, in reality, they are avoiding their own emotional void. As such, they are externally directed relationships. They, in essence, eventually become enclosed in a common cocoon and their love tends to contract versus expand. You can be relatively happy in a safe relationship but joy is elusive because little, if any, growth occurs because you are still in control. The dry creek bed has become a stream. COLOR IT PASTEL
  3. "Soul Mates or Great Love" relationships. Soul mates come into your life to expand your love because the Universe wants to use you in its loving plan. Great love relationships prepare you for the transition from ego consciousness to soul consciousness. As such, they are internally directed. The ultimate aim of Soul Mates ( or a great love ) is for each partner to emerge from their cocoon of fear and fully claim themselves. This is the love that Teilhard de Chardin speaks of when he writes; " The only right love is between couples whose passion leads them both, one through the other, to a higher possession of their being ". There is no room for the ego's need to protect and control here for this love confronts us with our deepest feelings and fears - and demands that we SURRENDER! There is tremendous joy in a great love because their is no greater joy than going through your fears, growing and discovering more of yourself. This love requires us to unconditionally or consciously love our partner and this love can both TAKE HOLD and LET GO - for this love is beyond emotional dependency. This love is not for the faint of heart for, indeed, most people who briefly experience it or taste it - will run for cover, not realizing that they are running away from themselves. COLOR IT VIBRANT PRIMARY COLORS - for you are now in the river.

My most recent relationship was a great love in which I surrendered and virtually confronted any fear that kept me from loving that deeply and, of course, felt myself and my love expand in the process. My partner watched me surrender and swim in that river but she only got up to her knees before she went into her head, out of her heart and eventually out of the river. However, a wonderful example of surrender happened after our separation. I had a precognitive dream of her leaping into my heart and actually experienced it during a phone conversation with her, a few weeks later, while we were discussing her running towards me versus away from the relationship. We both felt it deeply and it was definitely bigger than both of us! She quickly hung up when she got another call and later disqualified the experience. I , however, totally surrendered to it and later opened my heart to her and in the process fully claimed myself and my deepest connection to source. In other words , I let go of any pride, anger or resentment and instead completely surrendered and opened my heart.

IT WAS BIGGER THAN ME!

And by totally surrendering - I now saw through clearer eyes. I saw that my partner had, once again, run away from this experience as she had run away from fully surrendering to love in our relationship. I was now free and could clearly see the real reason for our separation - she was afraid to fully love because she was afraid of losing control.

The greatest remorse is love unexpressed - it is the ultimate NO to ourselves and it takes a great toll on our inner as well as outer health. Pride, unfortunately, is the last refuge of the ego and it's constant companions are denial and resentment.

Only love truly heals for only love joins us to what is deepest within ourselves. Only by surrendering to love can we emerge from our protective and controlling cocoons of fear and claim our deepest joy as well as our part in a universal loving plan.

ONLY BY SURRENDERING TO LOVE CAN WE TAKE THE FINAL STEP AND SWIM IN THE RIVER OF SOUL CONSCIOUSNESS - THE MOTHER AND SOURCE OF US ALL.

ONLY LOVE HEALS

ALLEN


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Allen Roland, Ph.D
PO Box 4094
Antioch, California 94531, USA
Phone 707-935-1908
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