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Radical Therapy

Chapter One
How You Can Use this Book to Heal Yourself

If your everyday practice is to open to all your emotions, to all the people
you meet, to all the situations you encounter, without closing down,
trusting that you can do that—then that will take you as far as you can go.
And then you’ll understand all the teachings that anyone has ever taught.

—Pema Chodron

Radical Therapy shows you how to heal yourself by opening your heart through a profound surrender to love, through a simple act of saying yes to your deepest feelings—yes to who you really are.

Saying yes means having the courage to express your truest feelings, and requires that you live from your deepest convictions. Saying yes to who you really are puts an end to a life controlled by fear.

My work as a radical therapist has proven to me that when we surrender to love by courageously going through our deepest fears and pain, our hearts will open and we will discover our authentic self—that is, the love, joy, and intention that is our original birthright. We will gain access to a profound state of consciousness—I call it soul consciousness—that we once knew as children. We will in fact enter into what I call the Unified Field of love—a universal ocean of love that exists beyond time and space and which surrounds and infuses all things.

The seven sessions described in this book—if you go through them with courage and determination—have the potential to jump-start your heart. They will allow you to surrender to love and reunite with the Field. You may use this book as a tool in your work with a therapist, a spiritual counselor, a healing group, or a friend; but it is also designed to be used without outside assistance for those courageous readers who are determined to heal themselves.

The Unified Field of love and soul consciousness exists within each of us—beneath our deepest fears and grief—and also beyond death, time, and space. The Field reveals itself in near-death experiences, in mystic states, to all children everywhere,and to those who say yes to their deepest feelings and surrender to love. The poet Longfellow described it as "the thread of all-sustaining beauty that runs through all and doth all unite."

In other words, each of us is a living portal whose hidden depths open onto the Unified Field of love that is our common source.

Radical Therapy organically emerged out of my own healing journey. By finally surrendering to love and going through my deepest fears, I experienced the Unified Field of love and soul consciousness that was hidden beneath those fears. I reconnected to that state of inner unity we all experienced in our earliest childhood, and most likely even in the womb. And this very process became the foundation of my work with others as a therapist.

Even now, after 25 years as a therapist working with clients from all walks of life, I am amazed to see, over and over again, how simple it is for us to heal ourselves emotionally by fully surrendering to the love and joy that is deepest within us. My work has proven to me that we can each return to the soul consciousness that lives within us as our original self. We can become again the joyous and open-hearted children we once were It really is that simple!

But the path to soul consciousness is the path of the heart, and living from the heart requires great courage. For you to truly heal yourself you must confront and go through your darkest fears—and you must stop being a victim by taking full accountability for your life. You must realize that you alone are responsible for the decisions you made to close your heart and settle for less than all of yourself. Only then can you joyfully claim your place in the universal loving plan in which you may now be a reluctant participant.

Until we fully heal, our adult relationships tend to reflect the deprivations we experienced as children with our parents or primary caregivers. Our romantic love relationships in particular become like grade D movies as we re-enact the same miserable dramas and childhood traumas over and over again.

The lessons of our relationships are a key focus of my work for several reasons:Intimate relationships are the litmus test—the literal testing ground—of our ability to surrender, open our heart, and move beyond our fears. Only in relationship can we free ourselves from fear. It was in relationship with our primary caregivers that we first became seemingly separated from love and where we first began to give in to fear and say no to our truest selves. So we began at a very early age to look outside—in relationships with parents, siblings, and others —for the inner validation we once had but lost and which is now hidden beneath an inner black hole of fear and pain that we are too afraid to confront or even feel.

I chiefly concentrate on feelings in my work, for only the full surrender to and expression of the primal feelings of our woundedness can lead us through our deepest fears to the ultimate feeling—love. Feelings are the thread we must follow to the love and joy at our core. And love is the ultimate feeling, the living pulse of our innate connection to the Unified Field of love, which is our common source.

I am convinced that all children experience this state of love and soul consciousness. I believe that it is even present in our prenatal condition, for at birth we all emerge from this Unified Field of love.

But in a short time we all become absorbed and finally trapped in the limits of conventional ego consciousness. Gradually, what our parents and teachers tell us becomes"reality"—and the truth we once felt and intuitively knew becomes a figment of our imaginations. Unable to really see us for who we uniquely are, those on whom we depend for love and survival project their own wounded selves onto us. And we as young children inevitably receive these projections, and are wounded in turn; we then become whatever we think we have to become in order to be loved and to survive. And so our life becomes a quest to overcome this conditioning and return to our original state of soul consciousness.

I spend most of the first session in my private practice explaining the paradigm in which my work is done. The first stage is preparation, the necessary first step toward healing. The second step is action, or engaging the healing/transformational processes described in this book. The third and final stage is integration, where listening to and following your own inner guidance leads to inner validation. This stage replaces the need for external guidance and outer validation that caused us, as children,to abandon our true selves.

The primary purpose of this book, therefore, is to demonstrate that beneath our deepest fears is a state of love, joy, and soul consciousness; that this love is the ultimate totalization of human energy, or the Unified Field of love itself; and that when we surrender through our deepest fears to this universal well of joy that lives within each of us, we are healed and transformed. We can all experience the same state of consciousness that Jesus, Buddha, and other great masters manifested in their lives if we will fully and finally surrender to love.

Using the seven powerful sessions presented in this book (which include exercises and homework), I have helped hundreds of people to emerge from cocoons of fear into greater aliveness, to move from a place of painfully separated ego consciousness to the place of inner unity and belonging that I call soul consciousness. These sessions are designed to help you heal yourself and fully open your heart by leading you through your own deepest fears and pain to the well of joy at your core. For only this depth of healing can end the unconscious re-enactments of unresolved childhood traumas‚ within which most of us spend the remaining years of our lives.

All my clients are referrals, and my average client is finished in seven two-hour sessions over five to six days or a few weeks, depending on the client’s availability. As a result of my own experience and my work with others, having seen that most people—with the right support and guidance—are capable of healing themselves in this way, I have become firmly convinced that most long-term therapy is nothing more than thinly disguised codependency.

We therapists cannot take anyone any further than we have gone ourselves. To help our clients learn to trust themselves, we must be able to move beyond our own fears and our need to control. I am convinced that to really help our clients heal themselves, we must be able to deeply connect to them from a place of soul consciousness. Only then can we effectively make contact with the emotionally trapped and lonely child in others.

By just such a deep and honest interchange of thoughts and feelings—or soul-to-soul communion— I inspire my clients to find the inner courage to own and fully express their long-suppressed, "forbidden" feelings and to pass consciously through their deepest fears to a place of inner joy, intention, and love that exists on the "other side" in all of us.

My only job as their "coach" (a term I prefer to "therapist"), is to empower them on this courageous path through their fears until they begin to feel the growing joy of inner validation. I call it Transformation Counseling. Because this is client-centered therapy and because the inner transformation usually begins to take place in only two or three sessions, I like to say that I jump-start the hearts of my clients. This work enables them to discover and heal the child within themselves, to open their hearts to the people closest to them, and, more and more, to open their hearts to others.

If you use this book as your guide and allow me to be your coach, and really engage the seven sessions outlined here—the very same ones I lead my clients through—you will go through a process of inner transformation. By that I mean that you will begin to fully open your heart, heal yourself, and discover the joy that is deepest within you. But you must do the work. The best I can do is help you get to a place of choice, a place of deep soul-based inner validation versus ego-based outer validation. The work presented step-by-step in these pages will allow you to experience this option. But it is up to you to choose.

Besides this primary therapeutic/transformational purpose, Radical Therapy has a secondary purpose: to show that my theory of a Unified Field of love answers the search for a grand Unified Field theory of modern physics. My research, personal experience, and psychological work with clients have shown me that there is a deep underlying and unifying force in the universe, an infinite energy field of love and soul consciousness in which all other forces of nature are merely conditions of state. And this infinite field of love—and not the speed of light—is the absolute constant of the universe. My theory of a Unified Field of love joyfully proclaims that psychology, science, and religion all rest on a common foundation of love.

The Unified Field theory that I propose has much corroborative evidence, some of which I will present in the coming chapters. However, in this book I intend to establish its plausibility and demonstrate its implications and applications only for the purposes of psychological healing and spiritual transformation.

There is every reason for human beings to undertake this healing journey through the underworld of their fears and pain. But the best reason is that love is the deepest part of who we are.

I heartily invite you to take this great journey of healing with me. Read each chapter carefully, dynamically engage each of the seven sessions, and do the homework and exercises as if your life depends on it.

Because, in a way, it does.

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Allen Roland, Ph.D
PO Box 4094
Antioch, California 94531, USA
Phone 707-935-1908
E-mail: allen@allenroland.com
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